A 4-step template for providing feedback that drives learning and growth.

Feedback conversations can feel stressful and hence many people avoid them.

With a little thought and preparation, you can have a clear and kind conversation that you are proud of.

The person receiving the feedback has the real power in this conversation. They are the ones who choose whether to implement or not. If the feedback is clumsy they will be triggered and won’t hear what you have to say.

Entering the conversation with good intentions to support and develop, focused on problem-solving together and avoiding blame and judgment places you in the strongest position to provide high-quality feedback which drives behaviour change.

(Set up the conversation with kindness and clarity)

You need to keep your colleague resourceful. The offer of feedback often triggers others. Focus on the message that “we” are going to work on this together as equals. Explain that you will take the time to hear each other’s perspectives and problem-solve a solution together.

❶  Describe the problem: Situation, Behaviour, Impact
❷  Purpose of discussion: To find a solution
❸  Invite: Can we work on this together?

(Invite their view and perspective)

Before someone is ready to hear your thoughts and ideas they need to feel heard and seen. Therefore we want to invite the other person to share their view and perspective first.

Suggested Questions
* Tell me more about……..
* I’m curious about…….
* I’m wondering……..
* Help me understand……..
* Walk me through……….

(Share further thoughts from yourself if required)

Now that your colleague feels seen and heard they are ready to hear your perspective which you need to share with clarity and power.

* That isn’t my experience……….
* The story I am making up is………
* The way I understood it………

(Decide together how this will be resolved)

Once both parties’ perspectives have been heard you are able to problem-solve together as partners.

* Tell me how you think this could be resolved………
* What ideas do you have for sorting this……..

Examples of feedback conversations

What to say when you win a promotion over a colleague?

How to give feedback to a colleague who is constantly moaning

Managing the colleague who is late for meetings