Help a colleague understand the impact of his moaning on colleagues.
When your colleague is under time pressure you notice that they seem to complain more.
As an extrovert, their presence is felt and the negative energy often brings down the rest of the team.
You don’t believe your colleague understands the impact of their behaviour on the rest of the team.
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(Set up the conversation with kindness and clarity)
“Tony, I’ve noticed that when you are under a lot of time pressure your behaviour with the team is having a negative impact on team morale.
I am keen to understand your perspective and to find a way together that this can be addressed.
Would you be happy to have a chat now?”
(Invite their view and perspective)
“For example, at the earlier meeting, were you aware of how your challenge of all the problems was affecting the rest of the team?”
“How did you see the meeting go?”
(Share your perspective)
“I saw it differently…………”
“I really like the way that you anticipate potential issues for the team but when it isn’t balanced with positives it can drag the team down as happened this morning. I am sure that is not your intent.”
(Decide together how this will be resolved)
“When you are feeling the time pressure, what can you do to manage your emotions?”
“Can I share a thought. Before you point out a problem with a new idea you share with the team two thoughts about what is good in the idea first.”